So...I went to a "Career Fair" today (TOTAL WASTE OF TIME!) and found several different cellular and insurance companies looking for motivated self-starters to work for commission and table scraps.

Did I mention that it was a total waste of time? 

It's not as if I had delusional ambitions of waltzing in and some recruiter pointing at me and yelling, "OMIGOD!! We simply must hire you for a Governmental Affairs position!"  But I sure expected a little more than what I found.

First, let's talk fashion.

There is a little term that I usually would apply to my grad school dress code.  "Shit-bum."  My clothes were clean---well, most of the time--and not shabby.  But compared to how I dressed for the duration of my undergraduate career, my jeans and tees were not the height of fashion.  Shit-bum does not describe my outfit today.

Today, I dug into the farthest reaches of my closet and found my suits from my lobbying days.  Thank God I had got them all dry-cleaned prior to high-tailing it off to Canada.  I selected one of my more modest suits--a pale gray--and paired it with a pseudo-conservative little black top.  A little search through my jewelry armoire yielded a nice string of pearls that I had received from my folks a few Christmases back, and I matched them with some dainty pearl earrings.  I finished off my outfit with a nice little pair of black Bandalino pumps. 

All in all, I looked like the young professional that I hopefully soon will be.

When I got there, I saw some women going in wearing slinky sundresses.  Granted, it was a sweltering 99 degrees F (37 C), but I was like, "OMIGOD, are they actually here for a job fair?"  How incredibly unprofessional!  To make this even more of a farce, I was dressed more professionally than all but one of the recruiters.  Eeek, scary stuff.

Next, let's talk about about the 'deer in the headlight' face.

"Hi, I'm Beth."  <smile> <handshake> <more smiling> Blah, blah, blah, exchange of pleasantries.  Then they ask, "So, what type of a job are you looking for?"

"Well, (insert particular recruiter's name), I interested in your Governmental Affairs or Public Relations department."

I kid you not!  This is the progression of every last one of their faces:

 Recruiter smiles as he or she listens to the beginning of my sentence.

 His or her face goes blank as he or she figures out what to say.

 His or her eyes grow large (like a deer's in the headlights) as it dawns on them that he or she (a) knows nothing about whether or not the company he or she works for has anything of the sort, and (b) that therefore the 'logical conclusion' is that the company obviously has nothing I'd be interested in.

 This is the "I'm sorry, I have no job to offer you" face.

BOTTOM LINE: I think I scared them at the point where "government" came out of my mouth.

I'm getting bored with this, so I guess I'll wrap up.  I learned a couple of things today.

Lesson #1: DRESS TO IMPRESS, and you'll probably outshine your competition.

Lesson #2: When they say "HIDDEN JOB MARKET," they're not kidding around.  I know that many of the companies represented at the job fair had government affairs departments, but these departments must consist of a small group of people.  Recruiters, from what I've observed, are out to snag those "Entry Level" peeps.

I am not entry level, for goodness sakes!  So...should I bother with going to anymore "Career Fairs?"  NOPE.

 But then again, after tomorrow, maybe I won't need to.... hee hee hee! Guess who has an interview tomorrow morning at 9am...

Wish me luck.  

 Cheers, friends

Wishing you luck as usual - had to come by after seeing the message you left for Yuan on messenger! Made the mistake of going to one career fair years ago - NEVER AGAIN! People peg you as desperate if you show up at one of these things! Again good luck!

Hi Beth, like maybe a million years ago, I went to the Federal Building in St. Louis and applied for a Federal job, they have a great long list of job openings. If you are willing to relocate, they will find you something really great. Better yet, go to the Pentagon or FBI -Langley. You've got to go where the good jobs are.

I share the frustration of not being able to find a job in your field. I have an Environmental Degree and I am an Insurance agent for the last 6 years. I love your blog by the way. You are a talented writer, and some of these posts just crakced me up.